The Mumbai-based matchmaker Sima Taparia delivers this meme-friendly one-liner in the seventh episode of the hit Netflix series Indian Matchmaking. But she departs from this well-worn model in her attention to one extra characteristic: caste. This silent shadow hangs over every luxurious living room she leads viewers into. She lumps an entire social system, which assigns people to a fixed place in a hierarchy from birth, together with anodyne physical preferences. This prejudiced treatment includes, but is hardly limited to, workplace discrimination in the United States. For example, the state of California sued the tech company Cisco in June for allegedly failing to protect a Dalit employee from discrimination by his higher-caste Brahmin managers. When a popular show like Indian Matchmaking neglects this alarming fact of the Indian American experience, it quietly normalizes caste for a global audience. Contrary to what some viewers might think, the caste system is an active form of discrimination that persists in India and within the Indian American diaspora. One of the primary functions of arranged marriage is maintaining this status quo. That explains why people in dominant castes often carry out brutal violence against their own family members who dare to marry outside their caste, particularly if a partner is Dalit.
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Reinforcing religion and caste segregation. Though the show is called Indian Matchmaking, it portrays no couples who identify as Muslim, Christian, or Dalit—.
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Netflix’s ‘Indian Matchmaking’ is only too accurate
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Critics accuse the show of stereotyping and commodifying women, lacking diversity and promoting a backwards vision of marriage where astrologers and meddling parents are more influential than the preferences of brides and grooms. They complain that the series, which follows matchmaker Sima Taparia as she jets between Mumbai and the U. In fact, the real problem may be their discomfort with the way marriage works in India, with social stability prized over individual happiness.
A small fraction still practices child marriage, with some communities holding betrothal ceremonies as soon as a girl is born. At the other end of the spectrum, there is growing acceptance of queer relationships, divorce and even avoiding marriage altogether. But most Indian marriages are still arranged. Even college-educated, urban, middle-class Indians show a strong preference to marry within caste.
Muslims in South Asia marry within their biradari or jaat — a stand-in for Hindu caste. The reason Guyanese-born Nadia faces a limited set of options in the show is not because of her South American birth, but because Indians who were shipped as indentured laborers to the New World were mostly lower castes, or so perceived. When the purpose of marriage is to find love, companionship and compatibility, then the focus is on the characteristics of the individual.
The marriage market is akin to a matching market, similar to Tinder or Uber.
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We cannot defeat racism if we continue to allow cultural biases govern who we love or who we let our children marry. In an attempt to escape the quarantine daze, I started watching Netflix’s new reality series, Indian Matchmaking , about the often-misunderstood world of arranged marriage. At first, I really enjoyed watching and somethings search for love and marriage in this traditional manner.
My friends and I laughed at snobby Aparna, cringed at the scenes with “mama’s boy” Akshay, and cried when sweet Nadia’s second suitor turned out to be an unapologetic “bro”. By the end of the eight-episode series, however, I felt nauseous.
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Indian Matchmaking is a Indian documentary television series produced by Smriti Mundhra. Indian Matchmaking was released on July 16, , on Netflix. Mundhra named the casting the biggest hurdle of the show, going through a client list of families and calling to see if they were willing to be on camera. Mundhra also noted that the series initially started with about a dozen singles but with some that “fell off” during production.
The show received mixed reviews between critics and social media users. In addition to showing ” classist ” and ” casteist ” stereotypes, the show was criticized for whitewashing the idea of arranged marriages. The Los Angeles Times followed up with the couples appearing on the show and reported that they are not together anymore. From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia. Entertainment Weekly.
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And despite the talk of all things wrong with the documentary, it is still ranked one of the most watched and talked about shows all over the world, especially in India. In the documentary, Sima Taparia, an elite Indian matchmaker, tries to find appropriate matches in India and America for all her clients, touring the houses of prospective brides and grooms while taking note of their criteria and collecting biographical details.
Deciding to not include Muslims on the show neglected to provide a closer look into the demographics of India.
Leila Abid is a year-old American-born Muslim from Los Angeles. When her Indian parents, whose happy arranged marriage has lasted.
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That Indian Matchmaking has upset people across the spectrum is slightly baffling given we are a culture obsessed with arranged marriages.
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